Tuesday 4.1.2008

Day 14, Treatment #4

So, what part of this is the April Fool's joke??

I went to work again today, both down and back with "wind gusts". Yup, both hands on the wheel, and hold on.

I got there ok, several minutes early. I wait in my car for the shuttle, listening to the current audiobook I've borrowed from the library. It's time to go--no shuttle, and I walk the long block over to the hospital. Still not walking at a normal pace, I watch the traffic signal to pace myself getting across 5 lanes of pavement before it changes again.

It's a new crew today, and lots of smiles and hugs. The unit is full, and the day was very busy with routine care, doctor visits, discharges, new patients replacing those. And on it goes. Myself, I had several episodes/spells/occurrances/events/times when I just didn't feel good, my head kind of swimmy, a snitch of nausea, hot flash (with cold hands, go figure), and maybe a color change in my skin tones, as I would get asked if I was feeling ok. Hmmph. Again, I'll say that I'm disappointed/discouraged/impatient with the recovery time of this last treatment. And am I thankful that it is the last treatment. And, I forgot to mention, yesterday the inside of my mouth sloughed off (sluffed?). I had pieces of tissue hanging from the roof of my mouth like stalactites. Yum.

One of my friends, Jan K., has finished her short shift, and takes me aside. She hugs/holds me, and prays with me. Wow, Jan, thanks. I needed some external spiritual uplifting.

A couple of the others brought me cards and gifts, too. One of them is a small, smooth, oval shaped "hope stone", clear with an ivory colored angel inside, lying atop a pink ribbon. It's just the right size to fit in the palm of my hand. The other is a collection of 30 inspirational sayings on the cutest little cards. Very appropriate. Thank you to each of you, who let me feel ok with not feeling ok.

I come home to Crud Castle, where Crud Man looks to be feeling somewhat better. This morning, though, his temp had gone back up to 101, and he saw the doctor. Doctor did not do a chest x-ray, but said CM's lungs didn't sound good, and wrote him a prescription for Biaxin, declaring the diagnosis to be bronchitis. (you think? he's been coughing a deep cough since Friday...) We are both happy that he has the antibiotic, and trust that he will be better in another day or so. Doctor warned CM that he won't be "all that" for 2-3 weeks, though.

Daniel has been working on the desk top computer again this afternoon, as he said we had another power surge go through the castle, and the computer got stuck in a shut down/restart cycle. He said something about having to reformat the hard drive....

Breon and Nick came in and fixed food for themselves. Daniel went off to bed. I caught up with a day's emails and wrote here.

Tomorrow is to be a sunny day, maybe a bit warmer. I hope to get outside, get a walk and sun and fresh air. As well as catch up on the house chores, that only get picked at, and maybe take a nap.

I will do my best to keep myself surrounded with the positive energies you send my way, with their colors strong and bold, and continue swimming through the murk in my head.

Thank you, I love you all.