Friday 11.12.2010 Dis-appointment

I woke this morning earlier than my alarm, but I stayed awake and did the first half of the lymph drainage exercises, hoping to get maximum benefit from my visit with Ike.

Shortly after getting to the therapy place, Ike and her client came out as they finished her appointment. Ike greeted me and went back behind The Door. About 10 minutes later she came out to get me.

She was friendly enough, but I felt a distance, and I got the impression that she felt this visit was unnecessary. We went back into treatment room 2 and she closed the door. We each took a seat.

As she interviewed me, and reviewed the paperwork, her conversation revolved around "chronic condition" and "self management", saying that lyphedema is always going to be a problem. Yes, I've heard this before, and this is maybe the third or fourth discussion we've had about it. I tried to stay neutral, as opposed to having a heated discussion, but I had a hard time not getting emotional. I was, after all, fighting for my physical well-being. Lymphedema may well be part of my "new" status, but I don't want to have a blow up crisis to be able to have a treatment for it.

Not so, in her eyes.

Without going into much more detail, she did do some sort of exam, though didn't measure my arms and hands like she had done before. She exclaimed how good I looked, and have I lost weight? (are you kidding--?) She went on to say that I'm doing really well, that the goal of therapy is to be able to self manage a chronic condition. She declared that she couldn't find a "problem" to treat. I knew by that time that she had no intention of doing any kind of treatment whatsoever for me, and we spent the next half of the appointment sparring about patient needs vs. protocol. I was told that maybe I needed a therapist to discuss my "fear of cancer returning" (really?) and that a massage therapist who was knowledgeable about lymphedema might be helpful. I asked her if she had someone that she referred to, and she denied knowing any. (I didn't say anything about my Leah--Ike and I have talked about her in the past). I left there very frustrated with The System and her premise of having to have a "crisis" to treat, as well as her unwillingness/inability to hear the patient's concerns and blatantly denying the obvious collection of fluid in my upper quarter of my body.

I thanked her for her time and left.

Ugh.

Next stop, Meijer.

I went through the store, collecting the items on the list, and came home. A light lunch and it was time to go to Leah's for a reflexology appointment.

Very much needed, and she did a good job, as always. She asked about the appointment with Ike and was about as upset as me. By the time this appointment was over, we had prayed for Ike to be able to help her patients, and thanked her for taking care of me previously when I needed it. I love being able to give up the negativity, to let God fill that space with positive energy. Thank you, God.

So my left shoulder and arm and right wrist are sore from Ike's manipulations, and I'm still "full" of fluid. I've decided that I'll wait until after the first of the year and make an appointment with the Michigan State University Lymphedema Clinic.

Tomorrow is a workday for both Dan and me.

Thank you for reading. Hugs.