Saturday 1.5.2008

What a nice day. We slept until Daniel's phone rang--and that was at 0900!! I dozed a bit, made a phone call myself, got up about 10. Breakfast, shower, life is good. I took the Christmas tree down, packed up the few other decorations we had out, and vacuumed throughout. Had a bite to eat, went to Jackson, came home, and now we're watching football.

One of the Comments about the wigs had a couple of good questions that I'll respond to here.


"Does it feel weird on your head?" Yes, probably because I don't wear hats or headbands or barrettes or anything. And the most surprising thing was that even within the same line, the Sophie style, for instance, the caps were a little different on the inside, so they felt different. Even with the nylon cap on my head. I'm sure they'll feel even weirder without hair... And there are wig liners to put on your scalp for comfort or to adjust fit.


"Try a Cher style..." On Shopping Day 1 Crystal had brought in a long haired beauty, just to try on. It was horrible. I thought I would love the feel of the hair, but it was the synthetic hair, and very thick. When I tried to move it around, you know, like fling it back over my shoulder, it stuck and was static-y and fly-away. It did not move well at all.


"How many wigs does the insurance cover?" Unfortunately, BCBSM does not cover hair prostheses. It does cover 2 breasts and 2 bras per year, but no hair. Fortunately we have a cancer insurance plan, and that pays $300.00 for a wig purchase. So, it's not about how many wigs get reimbursed, it's how far can I make the $300.00 go. Curious as to costs? Google wigs and look them up.....

There are wig styling products, too, like mousse, styling spray, shampoo, sculpting/hold product. We were told to be careful with heat, like opening the oven door and lifting the lid on a pan (for the steam), as the heat makes the synthetic hair frizz. Sometimes the wig place can fix the hair, but sometimes not.

Remember that I'm not going to make that purchase until I need to, to see what happens with the hair loss, scalp sensitivity, and what happens to my skin tones. I may need a different color than what we think. And we weren't all about styling the wigs on those days, we were looking at potentials. Both ladies said I could wear a lot of different styles...that I have a "versatile" face. : )

I appreciate all the comments, and look forward to reading them. We have one whopping support network here, that runs both ways. Thank you so much. I love you all.

P.S. Clean panties today, finally. 8 days. (If you haven't been reading every day, please see the Post "Girls, Only" 1.1.2008)

Friday January 4, 2008

I worked today, with a great group. Lots of hugs, smiles, and support. We were very busy, but at one point we clustered around a computer for a few minutes to see the latest in wig fashion. Interesting comments, and I love them all. I will not be making a purchase until I need to, because we don't know just how much hair I'll lose, if any. Also, my skin color might change, and I don't want to get something that doesn't do me any favors.


I got mom tucked into bed and got myself home. Dan and I visited a bit, and he stayed up with me until I got this blog written. I am really tired and am going to bed.

Thanks for reading, for commenting, and most of all for going along with me on this journey. You sure make the trip more pleasant.

Wig Shopping, Day #2

Today, KS and I went to Elegante Wigs and Cosmetics. A beautiful, sunshiny, cold, bright winter day. We go in, and a woman approaches us. I introduce myself and Kathy Sue, and tell her that I may be needing a wig in a few weeks, and why. Oh, she says, and her demeanor changes. From thinking we're a couple of chics looking for a little fun trying on wigs, to serious shoppers who may be making a purchase. She tells us her name is Gerry, and there are lots of wigs to choose from, so look around, select a few, and I'll come help you when you're ready to try them on. Oh. Ok. So much different than yesterday.

This store has styrofoam heads and plastic heads and just plain wire display racks and shelves loaded with wigs. Any color, style, and many manufacturers. There was so much hair in there I almost felt I was in a pet store. Well, I was in a hair store. And there was hair. All kinds of it. Where to start??

I guess we just look around, spin the racks, touch them, pick them up and shake them, read the tags, and select a few. It was a little creepy at first, but we loosened up and started enjoying ourselves. There were several other women, maybe 5 or 7, in the shop already, so it was somewhat congested in there. Gerry did explain that they were busy today, as the person who trims/cuts/styles the wigs was here, and the ladies bring in their hair to get trimmed up. (really--who knew you could trim/cut a wig??) Hm. Yup, there's hair on the floor over there. Hm. KS and I selected several hairs, and Gerry came back to get us situated.

A space on the counter opened up, and she found a chair from somewhere, and sat me down. She hands me a nylon thing to put on my head, like you do on your feet at the shoe store if you don't have socks on. No kidding. Now, you have to hear, listen really, these girls are giggling and laughing and having fun with their hairs. She gives us a brief introduction to wigs, and tells me to put it on. Oh--yesterday I didn't do that. I must have looked surprised, as she then showed me the tabs at the temples to pull on and then to line up with the temples. Oh--there we are. Another surprise as I look in the mirror. Gerry hands me the wig brush and tells me to brush it out and get it into place. Pretty soon, the hair takes shape as something I might really want on my head. Isn't that amazing?

I tried on several different wigs, as their inventory is quite large. Several colors of the same style, then a couple of another style. How interesting. And challenging to use the imagination to envision that particular style in another color, or that color in this other style. And remember, we can trim that up to shape to your face....

Geesh. Kathy Sue and I had brought the Kodak EasyShare camera, and a notebook with us today. After finding a style that the patrons and employees thought was "good", we photographed me. Interesting feedback from the other women. I have to say I liked it, and was very helpful in finding a style, color, and comfort level.

And we were loosening up, becoming a bit more comfortable, and starting to have a little fun. I was surprised at the patrons. These women come in, look around like you do at the shoe store, select a wig or two, get a nylon cap, pull in on, then put the wig on. They look in the mirror and play with the hair until it becomes something, deciding if they like it or not. Sometimes the women pulled off the wig they came in with to try on something different. I was not aware that wigs were "like that"--change them like shoes or eyeglass frames. We were about done with our time there, having become saturated, and there's that woman who has just purchased a new hair, getting it trimmed. No kidding. Be careful, I'm thinking, it won't grow back...

So here are the pics we took today. There are 5 different wigs altogether. The first 3 are the same style but different colors. The next one would need to be trimmed to style to my head, and the last wig (4 pics) would need the cap size altered, because it doesn't come in petite. Yes, I have a small head. Who knew?


These 3 are Aspen wigs, Sophie style.

color 12/26H


color Cola n'Cream


18/24H


This is the Estetica brand, style name Erika everyone thought it needed to be trimmed

color R8/26H



This is the Noriko brand, style Andi 1659G color Terracotta-H. This cap needs altered, and maybe hairs trimmed, too.





It was suggested to go wig shopping in neutral clothing colors, but with makeup done. Some shades of hair may require adjusting some makeup colors.

When we were done and got home, we had a bite to eat. KS left for home, and I realized I didn't have a picture to have as an "au naturale". So Dan took a couple pics...



I'm about wore out, or maybe saturated with hair. I don't know if my hair truly is that dark or if that's just the way if photographed. I know the gray is there. And the style--not too bad after spending the afternoon smushed in a nylon cap.

There are some other wig options we looked at yesterday, and I'll tell you, so you can look them up if you want. This is what we think we remember--Alan Thomas Designs style Diamond 7009, style Bliss color 33/27T, maybe style Laura.

Wow. Hey--any feedback is welcome, and I expect comments. Look forward to hearing from you.

Wig Shopping, Day #1

My friend and sister-in-law, Kathy Sue, came to visit today, with the goal of going wig shopping. I have been on the internet, looking at different sites, learning a little bit of wig language, and had only just a small idea of what I might be interested in.

We arrive at the Front Room Underfashions, which is a specialty shop for women--mastectomy undergarments, swimwear, hats, turbans, wigs, and such. We enter into a shop that has ladies fashions, handbags, and on the wall shelves, wigs. We joke about the very pink wig with a hat on top. I notice that there is a man in there, sitting and reading the newspaper, obviously waiting for someone. The employed person was sitting behind a counter on the opposite side of the room from him, and leaned around to see us. She came out around there to greet us. I introduced myself and KS, she told us her name is Crystal. An average size woman (with her own hair), nicely dressed, pleasant demeanor.

I told her what my situation is, and that I was looking for a wig, on the shorter side, with red tones. Ok, she said. We chose a couple off the shelf, and she invited us back into a "wig fitting room." Oh, didn't know there were wig fitting rooms. It was a comfortable room, larger print floral wallpaper, with a vanity and mirror, which had an embroidered dresser scarf set on it. I said to KS--hey, how'd they get Elaine's embroidered stuff?? There was an armoire maybe 4 feet tall, with the righthand side door open. Inside on the hanging bar, on hangers, were several , maybe 8 or so, undergarments. A full length slip, a body slimmer of some kind, maybe a larger bra, and several other items, I couldn't tell what they were. That wasn't my focus, but I did try to notice so I could tell you. There was a full length mirror mounted on the wall just to the left of the vanity table. A wooden parlor bench was between the mirror and armoire. All were of a darker wood finish, like a darker oak or walnut. Also on the vanity were a couple of wig brushes and pick and a large hand mirror. Crystal tells me the (matching) chair in front of the vanity is for me. KS sits on the bench facing me; I am facing both her and the full length mirror.

Crystal shows us the construction of the cap and teaches us about the construction and features of this particular wig. And puts, or maybe pulls, it onto my head. She fusses with it a minute, and I am watching Kathy's face. She is doing her best to not have any facial expression, but her eyes really want to bug out of her head. (Afterward, she said she was just trying to "experience the experience") I turned slightly and looked into the mirror: OH MY GOSH!!! Whoa!!! That's a lot of hair!!! My eyes are bugging out, and I'm not sure what I'm thinking about this whole thing. Wow. Then my hand migrates up and touches it, and starts to finger comb and fuss with it, and before too long, it starts looking like something I might have on my head. Wow. I never knew. The color wasn't quite right--a darker brown with gold tips. Maybe in a different color. I don't know, what's next??

Crystal was very patient, watching for my reactions, timing her comments and movements according to my and Kathy's responses to each new hairpiece. I think we tried on at least 10 different wigs. What we learned was that the red tones were very flattering to my skin tones, and Crystal said I had a "very versatile" face, meaning that I was able to wear several different styles of hair. We ruled out a few as soon as we had them on, but finally narrowed our selections to four. Crystal's advice was to not make a decision today. Think about all we had seen, to shop around, and wait until I see what I might really need because I may not lose my hair. Another concern I had was the hair color, if my skin tone changes with the chemotherapy treatment.

Prices ranged from maybe $135.00 to $640.00. Yo. No high end wig for me, being a temporary thing and all. (That's the hope, right??) Crystal logged our choices into their system so that we had that info. Looking back, it would have been good to have a camera and paper/pen to record that experience with. Now, it's mostly a jumble, as far as brands and styles and color combinations.

We left there and went to Ingham Hospital to pick up the medical records from my two surgeries. I was surprised to see that the size of the tissue removed from the re-excision was 4x3x2 cm. That's quite a chunk. No wonder the darn thing hurts. Then it was on to home, a bite of pork roast for dinner, and down to Jackson to tend Elaine. (we missed dinner, as we had spent 3 hours at the wig shop...who knew??) We got her tucked in, came home, visited, I wrote here, and am finally going to bed at 0230.

Whew. Thank you God, for Crystal and her kindness. And for KS and her strength--she put her arm around me outside the shop and asked if I was ok. I was surprised when my eyes filled. I took a couple of breaths and recouped. We stood in the warm winter sun, experiencing the experience.

Girls, Only 1.1.2008

This post is directed for the females out there. Of course, guys, if you're interested in what's happening in my menstrual world...

Remember that my tumor was hormone receptors positive?? And that I have been taking birth control pills for about 30 years? I've had a few breaks with varying lengths of time off of it, but my periods have always been heavy, since I started at age 13. Cramps, clots, 7, 8, 9 days of it at average 32 day intervals. And one of the wonderful effects of oral contraceptives for me is that I don't hardly bleed. A little spotting, panty liner worthy. The last time I was without chemical control was the summer Dan and I met. My flow was doing ok for several months--I was hoping to become menopausal without much difficulty--and Dan and I had decided we wanted to go forward together, get married. Then one night I woke up in a puddle. Oh No. I will not be waking my new husband to get up out of bed in the middle of the night to change the sheets, and the mattress pad, because I've bled through everything. So I called the Doctor and had my pills restarted. And everything was fine. Not hardly as much as a bit of pink on the tissue: "Oh, I must be on my period" Tra la.

Then I'm diagnosed with this hormone receptors positive tumor, which means the cancer cells feed on the hormones in my body. And I can't take my magic pills any more. And you know what happened this week??? Yup. Bloody panties, bleeding through tampons and over the edges of the peri pads. Four days so far, and I am about tired of it.

The good news?? Chemotherapy, radiation, and the follow up hormone suppression for 5 years will STOP that messy event. (so they say...)

For that result, I say bring it on. And how fitting this should be my last period.

Period.